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"***The cab pulled up, and Mike opened the door for me. As I stepped off the curb and into the car, he also offered me his hand."Why thank you Michael," I said, smiling."Enough with the Michael already."***I turned on the TV as we Mike settled on the leather living room sofa. "Take a long look," I said, holding my arms over my head with my wrists intertwined, "this is the last time you'll see me this beautiful." Don't flatter yourself," laughed Mike, "you're not that hot." Bullshit," I said, "I could have had any guy a that party." Whatever dude-" DON'T CALL ME DUDE, CALL ME TIFFANI!!!" I don't know who was more surprised by my words, Mike or me. Sensing the awkwardness, I tried to laugh it off."All I'm saying is that Kristin did an amazing job, and I never thought she'd make me look like a girl, let alone a beautiful one." Tiffani," said Mike, "I hate to burst your bubble, but you are not a woman, and your really not that beautiful." Oh yeah," I said, "you may think you're too much. She said that Willy wanted a child. But, none was forthcoming, no matter how frequently she and Ralphie fucked. So, I said, “Have they been to a doctor? They can check on that stuff, even provide fertility drugs.”Jill said, “Neither of them are working right now. They can’t afford that kind of thing.”I was wondering about the questionable ethics of bringing a kid into the world that you couldn’t afford. But like a fool I said, “I’ll pay for it.”The tests were done and the results came back. It was the worst possible news. Among her other flaws, Willy couldn’t conceive. That was devastating to her. Her whole sense-of-self and her life’s purpose was wrapped up in birthing and raising children. On the other hand, Ralphie was as potent as Shrek’s Donkey; the gods love irony!!Naturally, Ralphie took every opportunity to rub Willy’s nose in her inadequacies, which led to another heart-to-heart. I told him that I didn’t want another word about Willy. I said, “She’s your wife for God’s sake..
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